Sunday, May 24, 2009

Gargantuan Sputnik Head

So here is the famous line from the film "So I Married an Axe Murderer" that inspired this post:

"Head! Paper! Now!
Move that melon of yours and get the paper if you can!
Haulin' that gargantuan cranium about!
I'm not kidding, that boy's head's like Sputnik!
Spherical, but quick pointy in parts.
Well, that was off sides, wasn't it?
He'll be crying himself to sleep tonight on his *huge* pillow."

**I wish that you could all hear Mike Myers read this line...it's hilarious!!**


Here is a picture from my cruise with Jalen and Kelsey that also inspired this post:

From Diary of a Red-Headed Pharmacist


**Does anyone see any difference in the size of my head compared to Kelsey's?!? I can't believe that I opened up this picture to my friends and family.**


Ok...so I must admit...I have a HUGE head. The proof is in the picture. I probably should have composed this post on my birthday as I must apologize to my mom for having to give birth to me and my big ol' head. Or maybe I should phrase it as my big ol' head and then came me! I think that my birth raised my mom's pain threshold to an insanely high level. This later prepared her to be able to walk around Washington, DC for an entire week on a church trip with a broken foot and not ever think twice about seeking medical attention. I think my parents wanted to post a copy of the head circumference growth chart on the refrigerator because I was always WAY above the curve!!

The pain of having a massive head has followed me throughout my entire life. I never owned a Brownie beanie when I was in Girl Scouts because I don't think they made one large enough. As a band nerd in high school, my hat size always began with the number 8 while everyone else had hat sizes that began with the number 7. I used to blame my thick hair for needing such a large hat, but I actually think I have SO much hair because I have such a monstrous scalp that covers my jumbo head. It was always fun getting all of my hair up under my silly band hat.

Since I am quite sensitive about the size of my head, it often leads me to notice the size of other heads. Ryan Seacrest has an insanely small head (or maybe David Cook has an insanely large head?).

From Diary of a Red-Headed Pharmacist


Due to the fact that I pay fine attention to detail and realize that Ryan Seacrest has such a tiny head, I refuse to try out for American Idol. It has nothing to do with my singing ability...I just don't want to look like Mr. Potato Head next to Ryan!!

Maybe I need to look into a head reduction, or maybe I just need to lose some weight so that my head may look a tad smaller!! I guess I will now just go cry myself to sleep on my HUGE pillow!!


**HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELSEY...THIS POST IS IN HONOR OF YOU AND THE HUMOR YOU FIND FROM MY BIG HEAD!!**

2 comments:

Aunt Diane said...

Ok, Uncle Dale says you don't have a big head your friend is just a pin=head.lol I have never noticed it before. That picture is an illusion. I nearly peed my pants when I saw it.

Amy D. said...

your head is fine!

but thanks for making me laugh today!!!